why i’m still creating in quarantine (from athena)
an artist’s experience of isolation - Athena takes us inside her world with thoughts on creating in quarantine, honesty in work, and human connection <3
march 22nd, 2020
i want to make photos that feel authentic to what i need mentally right now, and this feels the closest that i’ve gotten so far in the first week of being home. i feel like if i can produce art that effectively shows what safety is in my head — in shadows and colors — i can be okay through all of this. if i can make it i have it in me to get through whatever happens. i want my energy to be put to my friends, and keeping each other afloat. I’m scared of what i cannot control.
march 29th, 2020
i think it is really important to make art and document what you experience and go through right now. looking back on writing and art from major historical events, we connect to them and humanize stories when we relate through people and emotion. i don’t mean making things as an assignment or responsibility, i mean letting yourself act on what you really need to create to get to the next step. all i want to do right now is keep going — things you make right now show raw emotion and endurance. i’ve been really getting into the work of linda mccartney, and it completely pulls me away from what’s happening right now. i go to her portfolio every night and shuffle through the same photos of her family from the 70s, and it’s like a new world opens up. i think everyone should make art, to keep that feeling alive for the next person. linda’s artwork feels fresh in my head, it feels like good news.
march 31st, 2020
i ordered my first pack of 600 polaroid film this morning and i’ve been doing a lot of research about early music photographers and i really want to wrap my head around making photos and where everything started. I think if you understand the methods of the greats you can act on instinct with success. i don’t want to make things complicated i just want to show how i feel and be able to make it look the way it does in my head. there have been hard days but there have also been days where i feel like i made progress on how to cope with stress and anxiety around things out of my control, which i think is something to celebrate. sometimes the hard days drag on and i get scared that the rest of quarantine will be that. and then what? i know i need routine and i know i need to make something everyday
april 1st, 2020
i think it’s comforting that humans are drawn to the same subjects over time and how you can connect emotionally to photos taken over 20 years ago. recently i am scared to talk to my friends about my fears about what’s going on. I know we all have a lot on our plates, and i know they’re all going through things, good and bad, that they don’t share, but i don’t want to add to the bad. Instead of letting that make me feel stuck, i’ve been looking through and studying art from the 60s and 70s. the idea that a person 50 years ago expressed themselves and came out with a product i would strive for today makes me feel less lonely. we are so similar but so far apart still, and i find safety in the patterns.
april 11th, 2020
i have been really anxious recently. it feels like there’s an overflow of information all the time and everyone is trying to make an important announcement over someone else 24/7. i want to listen but there’s too much and i can’t understand what anyone is saying. everything feels heavy and yesterday it felt like i was drowning. i feel better today. I’ve been watching documentaries and it’s been the highlight of my day most times. i like to watch them while i eat breakfast and then walk around alone for a few hours to process them.
